Saturday, July 31, 2010

Do I Want to be a Lawyer?

So Mom and I were just about to watch Michael Clayton earlier today and she told me "I wish I had become a lawyer." I was surprised because this was something she and I had not really discussed before. I asked her why and she told me it was because she wanted the knowledge and power to help people while earning a good living, yadda yadda yadda.

We proceeded to watch the film and it does *not* shine lawyering in a very flattering light at all. To me, it looks like a LOT of stress; endless hours of work, ass-kissing, shitty clients - not to mention the dull wardrobe.

A few hours after the movie, though, I found myself still thinking about what it would be like to live in that world. I imagined myself studying night and day through law school, trudging through all the bullshit as an assistant DA, working hard to get hired to a firm and ultimately "making partner," whatever that means.

I pictured myself in a court room. It really is funny to think of! Then I thought about all the images of actual women lawyers on televised court room trials and all I can think of is: they're all ugly and tired looking. I am sure some of it can be chalked up to unflattering, overhead courtroom lighting, but that can't be all. It's gotta be a hell of a lot of stress and I imagine it ages a person triple-time.

All that aside, I considered again what Mom had said - about being able to help people. I do have a passionate side about certain issues and a soft spot for underdogs and it *would* be incredible to have the power to defend something I believed in. But I don't know. I ask myself questions followed by answers that have nothing to do with the questions at all. Like...

Q: Do I really like to argue that much?

A: I am a very talented actress.

Q: Do I have the determination to make it all the way through the schooling I need to become a lawyer?

A: I am poor.

So, as it turns out, this topic intrigues me, at best, at the moment. But it is something I am toying with. I find myself going over all the little details of what I could to to make it happen from start to finish. And it's kind of fun!






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